A Practice of Self-Witnessing (5 min exercise)
“Everyone is carrying something difficult and grief will touch all of us. Mirror work can help us to sit with ourselves and acknowledge what is REALLY going on with us. ”
Purpose of this 5 minute exercise:
To soften into self-compassion, presence, and acknowledgment of the grief you carry.
What You Need:
A mirror (bathroom mirror, handheld, or standing—whatever feels most comfortable)
A quiet space where you won’t be interrupted
Optional: calming music, a candle, or a grounding scent like lavender
Step-by-Step
1. Ground (1 minute)
Stand or sit comfortably in front of the mirror.
Place one hand on your heart, and the other on your belly.
Take 3 or more slow, intentional breaths and feel yourself tuning in to how your physical vessle is feeling.
Silently say to yourself: “I am here. I am safe. I am allowed to feel.”
2. Make Eye Contact (1 minute or more)
Gently meet your own gaze in the mirror.
Just notice what comes up.
You don’t have to judge, fix, or analyze—just be with yourself.
3. Acknowledge Your Grief (1–2 minutes or longer)
Say one or more of these phrases aloud or silently. Let the words land:
“You have lost so much—and you’re still here.”
“It’s okay to not be okay right now.”
“I see your pain. I see your strength.”
“You’re doing the best you can.”
“You are loved—even in your sorrow.”
If tears come, let them. If nothing comes, that’s okay too. Grief has its own timeline.
4. Close Gently (1 minute)
Take some final deep breaths.
Sincerely thank yourself for showing up for this exercise.
Remember: if tears come, let them. If nothing comes, that’s okay too. Grief has its own timeline.
Optional:
Write down any thoughts, feelings or sensations that surfaced. This can be as simple as:
“I felt seen.”
“I couldn’t say the words today—but I tried.”
“I noticed how tired I looked. And I softened toward myself.”
Repeat this as needed. Notice how you feel over time after you’ve cultivated this practice.
This is the kind of compassionate presence we offer at our free, supported grief retreats through Project eleven 44.
You don’t have to carry it alone.
If this blog post resonated with you, consider joining our community here or applying for a sponsored retreat here (Note: You must already be a member of our Free Community and be logged in to apply for a retreat). Thanks y’all! -Xoxo, Brennah
